Today, Heather Quick, answers the most frequent questions her and her law firm, Florida Women’s Law Group, receive.
"Women Winning Divorce" is a radio show and podcast hosted by Heather Quick, CEO and Owner of Florida Women's Law Group. Each week we focus on different aspects of family law to help guide women through the difficult and emotional legal challenges they are facing. Heather brings over 20 years of law experience that advocates and empowers women to achieve happier and healthier lives. Join Heather each week as she discusses family law issues including divorce, custody, alimony, paternity, narcissism, mediation and more. This program was created to provide tips and insight to women with family law issues. It is not intended to be legal advice because every situation is different. Visit us at https://www.womenwinningdivorce.com/ for more resources. Text us at 904-944-6800 for a copy of Heather's Top 5 Divorce Tips. If you have questions or a topic you would like Heather to cover, email us at marketing@4womenlaw.com
Women Winning Divorce
Episode 40
FWLG’s Frequently Asked Questions
Julie Morgan:
Welcome to Women Winning Divorce with your host, Heather Quick. Heather brings over 20 years of law experience that advocates and empowers women to achieve happier and healthier lives. Each week, we provide knowledge and guidance on different aspects of family law to help lead women through the difficult and emotional legal challenges that they are facing. Listen in as she discusses issues including divorce, custody, alimony, paternity, narcissism, mediation, and other family law issues to provide insight on the journey of Women Winning Divorce. Welcome to the show. I'm Julie Morgan, and I'm joined by your host, Heather Quick. Hi Heather. How are you today?
Heather Quick:
I'm great, Julie. How are you?
Julie Morgan:
I'm doing very well. Heather, you can see my face, which means that you can see all of my expressions, some of the crazy ways that I look whenever you say stuff.
Heather Quick:
I love that because then I know I've really stumped you and we're going to have a really good discussion, so it's good.
Julie Morgan:
Oh boy. You know what? That's crazy that that's the indication. That means that I must wear all of my expressions on my face, which I'm not necessarily sure that's a good thing.
Heather Quick:
Well, I guess it's okay for a radio personality, right?
Julie Morgan:
Exactly, no television here. So, Heather, you know what? I figured we do something a little different today. Why don't we do, frequently asked questions?
Heather Quick:
I love it. I think that that will be hopefully helpful and we'll touch on as many stuff as we have researched and found to be frequently asked questions regarding divorce. Hopefully this will be helpful to our listeners.
Julie Morgan:
Oh, I'm sure it will. So, we're going to start off with a very soft toss to you. This one is easy. "How do I file for divorce?"
Heather Quick:
So, to file for divorce, it may vary in different states a little bit in the procedure because every state's going to have certain rules. In Florida, you have to file, let's say like five or six papers, certain papers to file for divorce. Georgia it may be three. But regardless, there's going to be a fee. You're going to have to pay the clerk of the court a fee, which is called a filing fee, and you are going to have to find out what is all this initial paperwork that is required in order to be filed. So, that's the first step and that's why most people do and should hire an attorney, because of the specifics of what it takes.
Because if you don't do everything right, the clerk will kick it back to you and say, you didn't do it right. Try again. So, time consuming if you don't really know, but you pay a fee and you have to fill out the papers, and basically it's a petition for divorce. It might have a different title somewhere else, but basically you're saying, I want a divorce and this is why, and this is what I want. Anytime you file a paper, you not only have to say what you're doing, but also what you want, in the proper language of course, which is the legal jargon.
Julie Morgan:
Okay. But how, as someone who's never been to law school, how would I know the proper language?
Heather Quick:
Many states, and Florida is one, they have a lot of forms online. There's a lot of different thoughts on that as far as how people and many judges think that is a disservice to the public to make them think they can and should do this themselves. It's almost like a fill-in-the-blank. That can be very dangerous because it doesn't really encompass everything and you may or may not really be fully protected, but it's there trying to provide open access, I guess to the courts. It's just a dangerous slippery slope if you start out on your own, as we've talked before, because you risk so many things being left out and not addressed.
Julie Morgan:
Yeah. And then you think, "Oh yes, this is simple. I can do all of this myself."
Heather Quick:
Yes. I think that it's just kind of like, you wouldn't think you can go into the hospital and do surgery on yourself even if you read a book. Doctors are trained in medical terms, procedures, safety and how to get the best result just like lawyers are. So just because the papers are out there, you can educate yourself, but trying to do it yourself can be dangerous, especially if you have any money, any assets, any debts or your spouse has debts or children. So doing it on your own is risky, that's the basic answer.
Julie Morgan:
And we've talked about how the more you have, the more difficult it can be or the more time consuming it is probably for the lawyer. And just as far as the children, the assets, it's more paperwork that you have to fill out.
Heather Quick:
Well it is. You want to make sure you're protected because you are filing for divorce obviously to be free. When you have children, and it so often happens and so many women think I just wanted it over with and I figured I'll just agree to what he wants to be done. It's not that I don't understand that thought process. So some things can't be undone. And when it comes to your children, compromises on that sometimes are difficult to change. But those are a lot of cases that we do go back to court on, and it can be very lengthy of course, and takes a lot of time and expense.
Usually, if you start by yourself and mess it up, it's going to take twice as long and five times as much money for us to fix it if we even can. Which is not an answer a lawyer ever wants to give. I mean, frankly, that's what we do. We help people solve their problems, help them get the best result possible in divorces. I don't want to have to tell you, sorry, this can't be undone. A lot of people are like, I don't have anything, and we don't have kids. I understand that. I do. I understand that thought process. It's just don't be surprised if you end up with some things later, and you’re thinking how am I still tied to this person? Or why am I responsible for this debt? Because you didn't fully resolve it.
Julie Morgan:
Alrighty. So next question, "How much does divorce cost?"
Heather Quick:
Well, that is a loaded question because of the range, and I don't want to appear to be flippant about it, but I'll say the average divorces are $15,000 to $25,000. And those are relatively contested. You're going to have issues regarding assets, alimony, and maybe children, and that's your average. But when we look at that average, I would say that's going to be 75% of the cases. So then we're going to have about maybe five to 10% that are going to be under $10,000 let's say. These cases are pretty amicable and it's not going to be as much. Then we have our six figure cases and that's again going to be five to 10%. Usually there's just a lot of disagreement and often we have to have experts and you have to hire the experts. But there can be hearings and a lot of litigation, meaning we're going to the judge a lot. So, there's a lot of attorney time, we're taking a lot of depositions. In that case, that's going to take at least 18 months, maybe 24. I know you're shocked by all of it.
Julie Morgan:
I am. Okay, so you actually answered a question that I was going to go back to that I kind of skipped over in my own notes. I'm sitting here looking at this and I'm like, "Wait a minute." Okay, so you answered one of the questions as far as how long it could take. And I know that that varies, but hold on, let's talk about the cost. Heather, I'm going to have to take out a loan?
Heather Quick:
Well, you may. The reality is if you want the results you want and you want to make sure you're protected, I mean that's the cost. That's what it's been for the past five to 10 years. I pay attention to that data. I look at it, we are very thorough. We don't leave things undone, but we don't do things that are unnecessary. Some attorneys are going to tell a client, sure, we'll go in there and allow testimony only to be from the husband and wife. And these are serious issues related to the children. Our firm doesn't do that. We're not going to court to have a judge decide something, to lose that battle. So we're going to have evidence, we're going to have witnesses. We're going to have things that position us the best way to win that argument. We prepare, but we're not out of line with everybody else.
They may say, this is a $3,500 divorce. Maybe if you're doing it yourself and not really talking to your attorney, not going to mediation, I don't know. Those really are not that common. I don't know if it's an increase in disagreements between people. Sometimes the court takes longer and is slower, which is a problem because then it takes us longer to get in front of a judge and then more things happen and stuff like that. But definitely, the cost can escalate and many times, well not many times, that is always directed by the parties. Now it may be the wife or the husband that just wants to be difficult or you're really concerned about your children and you feel like, if I don't stand up for this, I have a real concern about certain things and this is my one shot to try to do something about it, than they do. That of course, is determined individually.
Julie Morgan:
But when you think about the cost of divorce, it's so much more than the attorney's fees. It's also what you mentioned earlier, court fees as well.
Heather Quick:
Yes, the court fees, those aren't as expensive, but they add up. You have a court reporter and then if you have experts, of course, those fees are just as much as your attorney's fees. You do have mediation, which we've done episodes on that and the mediator gets paid. That also includes if you take depositions, you then may later want a transcript. So that sometimes can be $5,000 a transcript. So things... It adds up quickly in highly litigated cases. There's no doubt.
Julie Morgan:
And if you guys want to listen to those episodes about mediation, you can go to our website, womenwinningdivorce.com. Download, subscribe, and listen. Alrighty Heather, let's move on to the next one because I think I could just keep asking you questions about some of these questions all day, but we're going to move on. "Is there a way to get divorced without going to court?"
Heather Quick:
I'm going to say no because it has to be signed by a judge. You're not divorced unless you have a court order dissolving your marriage. Because you were legally married, so you have subjected yourselves to the laws of whatever state you're living in at the time of divorce. So in order to officially be divorced, you must have a signed court order. Now, many times that does not require you to physically go to court. It may be, it's easy on the discovery, everybody's getting along but yet still wants to be protected.
I would like to clarify that just because each party has an attorney doesn't mean they want a large fight. It just means they want their interests protected because they don't know what they don't know. And even if you are a lawyer, and especially if you practice family law, if you represent yourself, that's the worst thing you could do because you're not objective, but you want somebody to tell you, this is a good deal. These are what your rights are, this is the decisions you're making.
But it can be very amicable and never have to go to court. Except there is the final testimony. Many of the courts will do that by Zoom now. But that's testimony on the record for the judge that everything that's been written down is in fact the truth and they will sign the order. Now, that is for the jurisdictions in the northeast Florida area. There are some in middle Florida and I think Orlando might be one where you don't have to go to court. Let's say it's all amicable. We resolve everything and no one has to go. So that's why I said you need a court order, but you might not always have to physically go or even by Zoom. It's going to be very different depending a lot on the judges and what they deem to be enough proof that they know that you are who you are. So without getting too technical and things like that, but I think anyone wanting to get divorced should have in their head that, I'm probably going to have to go to court.
Julie Morgan:
Okay, so tell me this, one of the divorces that you mentioned, would that be no contest if, "Everything is everything. It's all okay." Is that no contest?
Heather Quick:
Correct. We do that many times. We will be hired by the wife and she said we've agreed on everything. We can't represent both parties. We represent her, write everything up as she has told us and then send it to her husband and he can sign off on it. hat'sT basically an uncontested divorce.
Julie Morgan:
Uncontested divorce. Okay. Alrighty. Want to make sure that my terminology is proper. Oh Heather, I'm really liking these questions. This is awesome. You're listening to Women Winning Divorce with Heather Quick, owner and attorney of Florida Women's Law Group. When we return, we will continue with frequently asked questions and I'll tell you the next one. "If my spouse and I live in different states, where can we get a divorce?" Ooh, that's a good one. Stay with us. You're listening to Women Winning Divorce with Heather Quick, owner and attorney of Florida Women's Law Group. Today we're talking about frequently asked questions and of course, Heather is answering all these questions. You know I'm not doing it. Heather, so next question. "If my spouse and I live in different states, where can we get a divorce?" I never thought about that.
Heather Quick:
So this is happening more and more often. We have so many cases because people are just so mobile and especially since the pandemic. People are all over the place because they have that ability. So in Florida you both need to have lived here. So let's say for example, your husband is, I'll just say Georgia because it's close, but I don't practice in Georgia. So he's in Georgia and the two of you lived there. But when the pandemic hit moved to Florida. Now mom and kids are living in Florida, but if husband is officially living in Georgia, it gets really complicated and it may be Georgia that has to be filed. Then without getting too technical, sometimes we might move it. But you have to think about where the two of you lived together as married. That's really important. When you were married, where did you last live together? Because that's what's going to be proper.
If you are the one that's moved here and he's never been here, difficult. Let's say you were both here and he moved out to New York or something and he's commuting. Good question for a lawyer, you'd want to ask. And that's why sometimes somebody comes to us, and we say, this is what I think, but let me refer you to an attorney in that state because we don't practice in say, New York. I mean, if you're coming to me as your lawyer, I'm going to really evaluate it. What do I think is in your best interest? I mean, what is correct? But if we have options, if we think we do, so then sometimes that happens and sometimes we work with lawyers in other states trying to either get it down here or have it moved from Florida. So it's a loaded question, but the first question you want to ask yourself is, "Where did we last live together?"
That's probably where you need to start. Then there are variables because when you have children and if things happen with the kids, there could be things that are emergency related. So it's not as easy as it seems. It seems like such a basic question and I've complicated it even more. But regardless, start with calling a lawyer in one of the states to start the process and understand what state. Because they're going to have questions and you may have to pay for a consult to meet with them. It's not something we can really answer over the phone most likely. Because the lawyers usually aren't on the phone. They're going to set a consult with a lawyer to help you really. That's a complicated one and we see that a lot these days. We really do. Even different parts of Florida and there's going to be variables and you want to look at, "Well, what's in your best interest and what's going to be the most efficient as well." Both of those for you.
Julie Morgan:
I look at the question and to me it does seem complicated. It really does because I would think, "Hey, can I get divorced anywhere and what's best for me?" That's what I'm thinking.
Heather Quick:
I understand and there's like a whole class in law school, a whole semester of civil procedure and you spend half of it on what's called jurisdiction. I'm not even go any further because trust me, it's not that exciting. But very complicated and very important.
Julie Morgan:
Interesting. Alrighty. So let's see here. Do I have to disclose all of my finances during divorce? I could answer this one, but you go ahead. You're the professional.
Heather Quick:
That's right, because Julie you're like, I've been listening to this long enough, we've been doing these radio shows and podcasts. I know what the answer is. There are certain ways you can keep that somewhat confidential within a court filing. But yes, there needs to be full disclosure or a signed waiver that you're waving your right to know that, which isn't in your best interest if you're not the one in control of the finances. But generally speaking, yes, in Florida it's an open discovery and it's not about hide it all. You have to disclose it all. That's an important thing to know and that keeps many people that really don't want and they don't want to get it in the public record. So, that's why I said there are ways to do it discreetly.
Julie Morgan:
Okay. And you know what? I'm going to kind of double back, triple back, I don't know. And go back to a question that I kind of glanced over and I said that you answered it in one of them, but I want to make sure that we hit the hit this. "How long does the divorce process take?"
Heather Quick:
Well, my favorite answer, it depends. But no, I'm teasing because people want to know. So I would say the minimum is about six months to 18 months. I think that is a very fair representative of the 80% of divorces. Can it happen faster? Yes. If all parties are in align. Can it last for years and years? Yes, it can. Not ideal, I agree. My philosophy is if we have had this case for two years, I'm probably kind of over it and I'm getting paid so they must be over it. So we'd really try with what's within our control. I feel like they want this done sooner rather than later. Not that we don't have good relationships with our clients, but if you were paying me for that long, I would imagine you'd be sick of me and be like, I'm done, we're done. I want to be done.
Most people do and we want that for them too. It’s a mixture of things that happen because everyone says it's the court system. And that is a big player in that. My client, it's like, we can make it work in two weeks to have a hearing. Court tells you, I don't have anything for three months. Then it's the other attorney's schedule and your schedule. With busy family law firms, they have clients, they have things scheduled. So, that just takes time. It does. I know we're always so used to, add to cart, click now. Deliver now. Same day delivery, Amazon. We're not there and it's really not appropriate when we're dealing with such massive things. There are certain time periods people have to answer things. Most of our clients, they need some time to answer it and gather documents.
So before you know it, three months has gone by and you're like, not much has happened. But there has, there is exchange between parties. If you have a month to give somebody your papers, it's rare I get them sooner than the deadline, but that's all right.Everybody has a month here, a month there. So things do take time, and there's the basic rules of how long you have to respond to things. Then there's the scheduling and that is challenging. And then you say, we want a mediation and some of the best mediators are really busy, but that's who we want because we want to settle it. If we're going to go, it's important to position the case with the right mediator who you think is going to help best settle the case depending on the issues in your experience. So that's kind of why we're at a minimum six months, 18 to 24.
Julie Morgan:
Oh my. Okay, next question. "Can I get a divorce if I don't know where my spouse is?" Like, no idea? How does that work?
Heather Quick:
Yes. That has certainly happened, that that has happened more than once. And yes, there are rules again in the court as to how you go about that. The funny thing is and I will say this and I would love a comment like, "No, I read those legal publications all the time or I read all the public notices in the newspaper." But there is that section, I think there are still classifieds in some papers nowadays, but there is this section public notice. That's where they put the foreclosures and that's where you would put the notice. That's sufficient because that's a big part of our American justice system and the constitution. Notice that somebody's suing you, somebody wants a divorce.
So that serves as a way to do it after you've done a diligent search, which is checking off all these things that you do have to do, to do so. But yes you can. It's a bit time-consuming. Meaning, we have to go through a checklist of 10 things, but it's worth it. Might as well do it, to get divorced because it's a no fault state. It's not like you can't get divorced, but that person just has to be notified in Florida. Other states, I would imagine because that publication is a familiar thing and important in states that require you to be separated for a year. So, if you don't know where they are, you probably have to file something to give you that period of separation. I think Maryland and North Carolina require a year of separation. Maybe South Carolina.
Julie Morgan:
Hold up. Okay, so Heather, does Florida require that as well? A separation period?
Heather Quick:
No, Florida does not. It's very rare and the laws do change, so I'm not sure if those states still do, but at one point they did. That's an important question that you'll want to know because then the timeline that I just gave you, that's going to be after a year of official separation. I know they're going to be more of the southern likely conservative states that are, I want to say Bible Belt, but where a lot of those laws come from. That's probably where you would likely see more of it.
Julie Morgan:
Okay. What is the reasoning behind that? Do you know?
Heather Quick:
I do not, but I would venture to say the intent of the legislature of the state was we hold marriage in high regard, and we want people to be sure. Just again, the government controlling what you do, but that's the way it works.
Julie Morgan:
Yes. Alrighty, next question. "How do courts divide property in divorce?"
Heather Quick:
Now, that can go a whole bunch of different ways, but essentially start with the premise that it's going to be 50/50. In Florida, 50/50. However, there's always a but, lots of buts in family law. You might have property before you got married. You owned a condo before the marriage. Okay, well there's a legal analysis we'll have to do based on your facts that the lawyer's going to evaluate. Or, I put my 401k into buying this house and that was premarital. Maybe, maybe not. But generally speaking, property, and there's physical property, but personal property and that includes 401ks, that includes retirements, pensions, all accounts as well, as property where you live and jewelry. Many of the women are like, that's my jewelry, but if he gave it to you during the marriage, it's a marital asset. So, not the engagement ring because that was premarital unless you got an upgrade. But anyway, yes. Start with the premise that it's going to be 50/50 and there may be nuances, there may be some specific things that can be pulled out, that's for your lawyer to evaluate for you.
Julie Morgan:
No, Heather. I'm trying to understand this. So you're saying, so one of the examples that you just gave was, let's say I owned a condo before the marriage. You're telling me that that could be 50/50?
Heather Quick:
Well Julie, if you put his name on it, yes. So don't go do that if you want it to remain your own. But if not, and there may still be a marital component, but it might still be yours. But ladies, don't put his name on your premarital property. That's just my general advice.
Julie Morgan:
Okay, Heather, this is where the prenup comes in, right?
Heather Quick:
Very helpful. Yes.
Julie Morgan:
So I could put in the prenup, "This is mine, all mine. And it will remain mine."
Heather Quick:
That is correct. No matter if he has paid the mortgage or paid it off or done repairs and proved it, contributed to the increase in value. That's really what we look at, the value money wise. But many people, when the market's great at the moment as far as the real estate market, but nobody's fighting over property. When you're like, that's my premarital property and it's less than what I paid for. It's like, well, the other spouse isn't on the hook for that loss.
That would be a clever argument. But no, because that's just the market. That one is so fact specific that your lawyer needs to answer. But as a general rule, you're married, you put somebody's name, I mean, it's not an argument worth having because property rights are very strong in the United States. If you are on a deed, those are of high regard and it's going to be joint. Just like if only your name is on the condo and you guys lived there forever, but it was only yours, you bought it before, even if you left there 20 years, there may be some value, but that property is your own.
Julie Morgan:
I have so many more questions, but I'm not going to go there. You're listening to Women Winning Divorce with Heather Quick, owner and attorney of Florida Women's Law Group. Today we're doing something different. We're answering frequently asked questions. I'm going to tell you the next question. "What is the difference between legal separation and divorce?" You got to come back to listen to this. Stay with us. Welcome back to Women Winning Divorce with Heather Quick, owner and attorney of Florida Women's Law Group. Today we're answering well Heather is, she's answering frequently asked questions. So Heather, the next question is, "What is the difference between legal separation and divorce?"
Heather Quick:
In Florida, we do not have a legal separation. By that I mean it's not in our statutes. And that's how when whatever state you live in and you want a divorce, you are bound by the statutes, the laws in that state. Our laws do not address a legal separation. There is no such thing in Florida. I mean, you have to file for divorce in order to create a line of how we're going to measure the date evaluation. So we talk a lot, you'll hear lawyers say, the date of filing. That's why, whereas some other people may say, legal separation, and then the money I made after that shouldn't be there. But it's not a legal separation in Florida. But there are other states that do and so it will be those laws. But in Florida, can you have a separation agreement?
You could create that, which is almost like a postnup without me getting too crazy. Two people could come up with a scenario in something that would be upheld in court. But that is very different. There are no real laws that address legal separation versus divorce. Many times someone will come to us and want some kind of direction, "We've been separated for a while, but I need official support or rules on the time sharing. Can we get some kind of legal separation?" It's like, no, you really need to file for divorce. We have one law in Florida that allows you to file just for alimony without being divorced. Those are going to be in very narrow cases. Sometimes it's for religious reasons. There can be many other reasons that I won't get into, but it's going to be a very specific reason to do that. So mostly in Florida, it is going to be divorce, it's going to be how you're going to achieve what you want regarding support and money.
Julie Morgan:
Okay. You know there's a lot of places I want to go with that one, but I'm going to leave it.
Heather Quick:
I know.
Julie Morgan:
Alrighty, next question. "What is the difference between an annulment and divorce?"
Heather Quick:
So an annulment, we refer to it as the common law. That's really the law handed over from Old England. Those are laws built on cases. The judges interpret the law. So we have our statutes. In our statutes, it's divorce as I've talked about before. That's really the only thing you can file for. Now, have we interpreted some things before and filed for an annulment? We have, but that's going to have to be very narrow and specific most of the time. What people are really seeking is what is necessary for that. I don't know, it's not really absolution, it's religious reasons. It's for their church, their synagogue.
There's very specific things that are important to them for their faith to have done. That tends to be what would gear us there towards looking for something that the church would recognize within a divorce. I mean, it is a divorce. However, like I said, those are specific. People are like, "Well, can't we have an annulment? We never consummated the marriage. Or they lied to me, they weren't who they said were, it was fraud." There may be ways that we can do that, but essentially it is a divorce. But if that helps make sense, I mean, that's what I have found in my experience. They're really looking for that, for that other reason.
Julie Morgan:
That created another question for me. Okay, common law, is that a form of marriage in Florida?
Heather Quick:
Oh gosh, no. No. That is a good question though. That is a really good question. Because many people live together and they sometimes mistakenly believe that this creates any legal obligation and it does not, even if you have children and live together, there is no common law marriage in Florida. There are in other states and they're very specific on what is required in other states. Now, without getting so very complicated, but within all our states, in the United States of America, there is what's called the Full Faith and Credit Act. Meaning, if you have a court order from another state or a legal designation or something from another state, the Florida Court should honor it. I have never had that particular situation, but if you were determined to be common law married in another state, there may be a way for you to then have some legal rights asserted in Florida if you divorced or your partner died.
But that would be really specific. I don't have any examples of that myself, but it is a good question. I've been asked that many times before and what people really need, it's almost like it's really just a contract between the two of you, even if you're not going to get married. Because remember what happens when you get married? Okay, now you have laws that protect you or that really recognize that relationship. Well if you don't have that, you can create your own. I mean, it needs to be a legal contract and done the right way between the two of you in regards to finances or something. I mean, people have had that, like cohabitation agreements and stuff like that. I mean, that's a smart way to do it because people never want to be married until they separate and they're like, "Wait, I have no real remedy."
Julie Morgan:
Do you do that?
Heather Quick:
We have. It's similar to a prenup or postnup. I mean, it's a contract between the two of you. Yes, and it's a smart thing to do, especially where you'll see it, Julie, that is very common. I believe, and maybe some law professor in law school many years ago said this, but if you look at Florida, we have so many retirees, many times for them to get married, it's just economically detrimental based on whatever their situation is usually. Maybe they're a widow/widower and it's not feasible, but they want to be together and that may make sense or it may make sense to keep everything separate and they do want to live together.
I think that's why there is no common law because there is so much of that that would be more detrimental to the people of Florida, at the time, maybe when they were conceding whether to adopt it or not. It may be why? Well, that's not going to benefit the people. They don't want it. Legislature doesn't propose that. I mean, that's really how the whole legal system works and things get proposed. So, that was always my understanding that so many folks as they retire, they wouldn't want that common law marriage to apply.
Julie Morgan:
Okay, next question. "Will I have to pay alimony or spousal support?"
Heather Quick:
Maybe, you might. And you know me, if you're a woman, I'll do everything to keep you from paying it.And if you're the woman who's making more money and if he's making more money, then I'll do everything just to try to make sure he does have to pay. So, that is a purely financial... I mean it's not purely financial. The majority is financial. Then there's like 20 some factors as to how we determine alimony. When you've been married a long time and your spouse makes more than you, okay, maybe. The question then is, how much? Okay, well we got to do a lot of financial analysis.
That's not something anybody should give you a figure off the top of their head because we really need to know what's coming in the house, what's going out, how does that lay out? That takes time to give you a good figure. Then it depends on your need or his need. Sometimes both are high earners, so it's equal. But what is important to know is you're not getting half of his income and he's not getting half of yours. Many people over the years have said, I just want half. That just seems fair. Half of his salary. But that generally doesn't turn out that way, is what I will tell you. It is an analysis. We do that all the time on either side, but looking at ability to pay and need and both of those things are really important.
And just saying, we're going to split it. It doesn't work that way. It's definitely analysis of who's making what, whose expenses are what, and then how do we come up with that? At least to be able to tell you, advise is where I think your chances are in court. And that is the evaluation in Florida. All the states, again, have different alimony laws. Some, Florida is more generous, I would say, to the person receiving alimony, but it's a wide range. You really need legal advice and an understanding on the issue of alimony. If you think you may have to pay, you definitely want a good evaluation. And what does that look like? Or if you think you might be entitled to it.
Julie Morgan:
Okay, Heather knows that I was one of the people asking, saying, "I want half." Oh, boy.
Heather Quick:
Oh, come on Julie, be honest. You're like, "I want 75%." Now, come on. Let's be real. And that's okay. We want what we want, but then sometimes we got to bring it back to reality. I won't say, "I disagree with you," I'm just telling you what the law is.
Julie Morgan:
Go ahead.
Heather Quick:
Go ahead.
Julie Morgan:
I can appreciate your honesty because when someone comes into your office, you have to be honest with them about what they can expect so they're not walking around blind.
Heather Quick:
Indeed, and many times it's not really what you want to hear, but it's just the reality of the situation. Our whole team would be doing a disservice to tell you anything but the truth. Or the truth is the law. This is the way the law is. Now if you want X, Y, Z, if there is an argument and there's evidence that we can put forth, these are valid ways, we can advance what you want. But it's very unlikely and it's really important to have realistic expectations because of the way the courts follow the law. And you moving forward thinking now you're going to be entitled to more than you are.
You're just going to be sorely disappointed and you will have spent a lot of money after something that was going to be very unlikely to be won or ordered on your behalf. It's important to know. Now, it doesn't mean, like I said, the law, they're facts on so many different sides. I mean, that's what we do. We take your facts, we take the law and we see how can we creatively apply the law to this situation. There are different ways we can present a case to a judge and say, this is what we have on our side to support that. But at the end of the day, if we're doing that for the judge to make a decision, it's always good to know, they may be advancing this case and trying to get way more, but the reality is this may be more realistic.
Julie Morgan:
Yeah, realistic. So Heather, I'm going to skip to the good part. This is as far as the next question is concerned, "Should my future spouse and I have a prenuptial agreement?" We have about a minute left and I think I know the answer to this.
Heather Quick:
Yes, I do. I think it is a great way to have discussions about money and the future and plans before you get married. It doesn't have to be a downer in trying to prevent marriage, but I think it's really important. You don't talk about a lot of those things because you haven't experienced them. One thing on child rearing and on finances and, what if I stay home, then how is that going to work for me? And then, you want to leave, and I should be supported. I think those are realistic conversations that can be done in a way that really give you a sense of how you can be protected. Otherwise, you are subject to the laws of whatever state you live in when you are getting divorced.
Julie Morgan:
Nice answer. Anything else you want to add?
Heather Quick:
Well, just that these were of course, very general questions on topics that pique your interest. Not intended to advise anybody one way or another, but to let you know that it's not always a straight yes or no. It's really dependent on your particular fact. So if you have any of these questions and you're considering divorce, I suggest you just give us a call at Florida Women's Law Group, let us help you and advise you to the best that we can for your particular situation. So you know really where you stand moving forward.
Julie Morgan:
Heather, it is always a pleasure.
Heather Quick:
Thank you so much, Julie.
Julie Morgan:
I'll see you next time.
Heather Quick:
Yes, indeed.
Julie Morgan:
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